I was utterly amazed when I browsed a pamphlet displayed at
my local NHS clinic. The title was, ‘Supporting Young People and Families’. I
was made aware of a whole range of psychological and physical problems
youngster may have to endure, caused by wrong thinking, wrong beliefs about
self, dietary deficiencies, and lack of exercise, poor social skills or bad
parenting. And yet when I look back to my own youth in the early 1940s I cannot
remember any counselling services for dealing with such things. Indeed, if
there were problems, it was commonplace for parents to help their offspring
resolve them. Children could freely talk to their parents about anything bar
sex, for that was a taboo subject. Even teachers dared not include it in their
syllabuses, apart from a few simple bird and bee illustrations in picture books.
Mum and Dad might leave such a book in a place where it may be found.
There were bullies at school, including teachers, but one
had to overcome them by showing them they could not win. There were a few young
people who tried cannabis, but there was no widespread drug abuse, and
regarding eating disorders I was not aware of Bulimia Nervosa or Anorexia
Nervosa. No one needed play therapy, as we played whenever we wanted. Our
parents were capable of supplying all our needs, and certainly they did not
lack parenting skills. There was very little sexual activity between youngsters;
hence there was no need for specialist advice about concomitant diseases.
Alcohol was not readily available, except in public houses; therefore addiction
to it by teenagers was never a problem. We tried smoking cigarettes, but became
sick as a result! Few of us had an image identity problem, as few were obese,
nor were we constantly bombarded with advertisements convincing us we should
resemble someone more beautiful or more handsome. Some of us may have been
hyperactive, but we could soon get that off our chest, by running through the
countryside, digging the garden, cutting hedges, cleaning windows or delivering
newspapers. There was no need for anger management, but if we were angry we
could take it out on a punchbag, play rugby or football.
In a close-knit village community we were never short of
friends, and by interplay we developed our social skills for communicating and
building relationships. Going through the gangly and hair-raising, pimply stage of
puberty was a shared experience that helped us through that awkward time. Sadly
today, an increasing number of young couples lack social skills, and they do
not have an understanding of what is required for building happy, loving
relationships. Instead of getting married, they experiment by living together to
see if things will work out, which often is not the case, affecting tiny
offspring who suffer the consequences.
Yes, there is much sickness in our land because of the
breakdown of traditional family life. In this day and age, both male and female
partners have to work to make ends meet, thereby denying time for their
children - time for lavishing them with love and for teaching skills required
for adulthood. It is no wonder we have private clinics offering multiple therapeutic
services, primarily with the aim of making money by applying sticky plasters to
injured bodies and minds. One big ingredient for the health of our youth is
missing, and that is tuition for the soul. Young people receive little to no
spiritual input, so that they have sparse understanding of morality - what is
right, what is wrong - what is good and what is bad.
Parents, the ball is in your court if you have the skills,
knowledge and desire for making a difference.
Links
Adolescent Support Clinic
Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder
Obsessive–compulsive disorder
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive%E2%80%93compulsive_disorder
Obsessive-compulsive disorder - at the DOPA Accessibility Website
Obsessive-compulsive disorder - at the DOPA Accessibility Website
Dudley Family & Adolescent
Support Team
Medway Child and adolescent support
